The Singaporean Identity

  You know, I've been thinking about the reasons why whenever I am told that a piece of art or product, or anything in general is Singaporean; I immediately assume it's utter shit and only mediocre at best.

  You'd think that being from Singapore, I should have an inflated sense of the quality of stuff that comes out of here. Maybe it's down to reputation, maybe it's just because I really hate this place and can't really exactly work with most of her people.

  Maybe it's how we like to pride ourselves on being the best at following the road well traveled.
I always felt that was the biggest weakness of the common Singaporean. We spend so much of our early years being taught that we have to "Follow this, do that because that how it's done." We are rarely allowed to question why. By the time we get to adolescence and are allowed to open the floodgates, we pretty much already have had this anti-question mindset hardwired in our brains. If we do have questions we don't even dare ask anymore. (This could be purely personal but considering I grew up the same way as 80% of Singaporeans this could be a pretty common occurrence) For awhile I had to really fight against this ingrained mentality to come up with my best ideas. Even now I find myself fearing mockery when I went against the status quo and pursued something unconventional, more so than I feel I would if I had grown up elsewhere, in a place that encourages creativity from a young age.

  I also found that most of those who actually try to break of from that hardwired mindset seem to pursue creativity the wrong way. They would push ideas for the sake of pushing ideas.

 If it were a product, it would be a solution to a problem that didn't exist, a feature that was never and would never ever be asked for. If it were a script to a performance be it live or on camera it would be absurd and out of place. Like how they pretty much just shoehorn family values into almost all Mediacorp dramas at one point.

  Absurd is alright, but if only it were entertainingly so. If not, it belongs at a brainstorm session and not on the film set.

  Music wise, it's all about what sells, or what they think sell. Most people just sound exactly like the last hot thing that came out.  It's all about appearances and shit. Sure there are a bunch that sound really fresh that I know of, but those are geniuses who also happened to win the genetic lottery.

  And I doubt it's even just me, I find that I find quite a large number of us like that too. We keep lamenting that local artists don't get enough support and recognition and when given the choice between a local and a foreign piece of work, we immediately flock to the foreign one.

  It's going to be quite a road to break that.

Well..... That hurt...

Oh fuck....... Blood tests..... Just minutes away..........

Blood tests again... So not looking forward to this....

It's just hopeless. I can't seem to find any meaning in this life I live. Noone understands what I say or go through anymore.

Burger King......... With mushrooms and beef.

Parents...

Parents these days.... They love blaming everything on the children, never looking at themselves. In the end, they "successfully groom" their children to always bow down to others and not ever to decide for themselves.

So my gaming clan's on the verge of disbanding and I can't do anything about it..

Another rather boring day just passed, I have nothing to do....

Just mistook some stranger for a friend and was left hanging. :/

Not feeling very well recently. Damn that ciclosporin really suppressed my immune system really well. Alittle too well, I'm pretty sick now.

Atmosphere at home's pretty tense now, computer's fucked and everything else's screwed up.

AFO at midnight. :p
Still waiting......

Oh great. Blood tests, again... Why me....

Another hospital trip.....

So here I am, in this damned place waiting for the test results. Why must I keep doing this kind of thing...

Boredom strikes again. I can barely game on my PC now. Whole thing's screwed up, really have to get a Qosmio some day.

God that was fucking painful. Seriously just hate this life of mine.

Definitely not enjoying this...... Stupid Asian fathers, can't speak English, always trying to look smart. And now he's probably getting me killed. Just fucking perfect.

Blood tests......

Great, just fucking great, weekly blood tests and liver deficiency induced obesity, that's all I can look forward to now. I hate ciclosporin, thanks alot dad, you fucking fag.

At the hospital still waiting for my turn.. God this is slow as hell, been waiting for over three hours already.